Is there an identity you kind of want to try out, but you think you'll pretty much suck at it?
Let me tell you a story.
(But spoiler alert...you are NOT alone.)
I painted the background on this canvas about a month ago and absolutely hated it.
I wish I had taken a before photo, but you'll just have to imagine the diagonal stripes of turquoise, gray and gold. It was a bit of a mess.
So it sat against the wall in our bedroom since then.
Every few days I would think about it and how I could fix it. I even brought it out of our bedroom a few times, only to return it hours later. I hadn't got up the courage to revisit it. I honestly thought all I would do is make it worse.
A few days ago I started reading a new book, Your Inner Critic is a Big Jerk (which is just as awesome as the title), and it encouraged me to pull out my paints and get to work.
I wouldn't call myself a painter by any means - I don't know technique or what tools to use etc, BUT after these happy little Bob Ross clouds started to come together this morning, transforming that background I once hated into something that's making me smile, I realized that maybe I should rethink how I define myself.
I actually have some encouraging and wonderful memories of being a painter. In elementary school, my art teacher Mr. Robinson taught me how to paint a landscape. I have vivid memories of him standing over my shoulder, giving me tips on how to make mountain peaks and waves of water. It was all very Bob Ross, kind of like my clouds.
So I thought of him as I painted yesterday. And thanked him with each brush stroke and squirt of paint.
Yes, I literally squirted the paint directly onto the canvas. See what I mean about technique? But hey, it worked.
I'm sharing this to encourage you to think about how you define yourself.
What identity would you like to have, but are maybe too scared to give a chance? Or what is that thing you used to do as a child...an identity that you used to wear proudly, but for some reason you discarded and haven't tried back on?
You get to define who you are! And if you're struggling with that, definitely check out this book.
It is a super cheerleader!
XO,
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