A Dose of Encouragement

Oh yes, it's Friday friends!

Thanks goodness.

How are you doing over there? I wanted to share a bit about what's going on with me lately, and a few links to inspire and encourage you.

I've been blessed with commissioned artwork requests the past few weeks. The serendipitous thing about this is that just when I decided to take a break from working at the crazy pace I had been, some really wonderful and meaningful projects came my way.
This is the most recent one:

When this request came to me, I immediately knew how I wanted the finished piece to look. One of my favorite things about these pieces is that they stretch me to draw new subject matter. I had never drawn an amaryllis before, and it was a fun challenge. 

This dog portrait was a surprise birthday gift which made it even more fun to create...

And how fun is that name?! I used one of the owner's tattoos for inspiration for the flowers and color palette. 

And finally this piece was created for the shared bedroom of two young sisters. Do you see the little bee and lady bug? Those represent them...how sweet is that?! 

I'm sharing all of this with you to prove that the universe has your back. Just when I felt discouraged and that my art wasn't the quality it should be, or reaching the audience I wanted it to, these projects came my way. 

That validation means everything!

And as I promised, here are a few links to encourage and inspire you...

• What it takes to Turn a Hobby Into a Career at Age 40 with Lisa Congdon
• Jen Hewett on Letting Go of Perfection and Growing Multiple Skills to Enrich her Creativity
• And finally my FAVORITE podcast for creatives - check out the latest episode of Creative Pep Talk! The 6 Step Process to Unlock Powerful Creative Business Momentum

Hope you have a fantastic weekend friends!

XOXO,

Keep Going

Oh, hello there friends.

Boy has it been awhile since I blogged. A lot has changed for me in the past few months, and even in the past few weeks. A lot of growing and discerning where things are going, and where I want them to be going.

Have you been in a similar season? It can be exhausting, right? But also freeing. Figuring out who the heck you are, what matters to you, and what path feels right for your soul. 

If you follow along with me on social media, especially my Instagram stories, you know I love to start a slow morning with a good book and a mug of coffee. 

Last weekend I read Keep Going by Austin Kleon and it was so lovely and encouraging that I wanted to share a few of my favorite snippets with you. 

You're not supposed to start with the end, but I will say that the last page made me cry and say YES! out loud and nod my head and then cry some more. It was exactly the reminder I needed on the day I read it. 

Don't you love when a book finds you at the perfect time? 

One of the serendipitous moments where the book met my life is where Kleon talks about creating a "bliss station" in your home. 

My husband and I recently switched desk spaces at home. He needed a more private space so he moved into our downstairs rec room, and I moved my desk into our family room. This has been the best surprising game changer for me. I hardly every used my art space before because I had to be alone and away from my family, and when I'm home I want to be with them. 

"Creativity is about connection - you must be connected to others in order to be inspired and share your own work - but it is also about disconnection. You must retreat from the world long enough to think, practice your art, and bring forth something worth sharing with others."

Now I'm sharing the space where we do life together and it is perfect. If I need quiet I just pop in my headphones and get to work. I still do love creating from the comfy corner of our couch, but last night I sat at my desk to work on an illustration and it was so wonderful. It is amazing what this switch has done for my motivation and attitude toward my art. 

Kleon says, "A bliss station can be not just a where, but also a when. Not just a sacred space, but also a sacred time." Depending on your life and schedule, it can be hard to find a place and a time that works. The important thing is to find one that works for you. 

Another lesson in the book that hit super close to home for me was the notion of doing the creative work and letting go of the tight grip on BEING the artist. 

For the past year and a half I have been so focused on results and productivity, that I had lost the joy of simply creating. I don't recommend this unnerving path, but at the end of the day, coming back to joy feels like returning home after a long trip, and that is a particularly wonderful feeling. 

"Art and the artist both suffer most when the artist gets too heavy, too focused on results."

It had gotten so heavy for me, this "professional artist" life. I was so weighed down I could barely breathe. And when you can't breathe, you can't create. 

One of my very favorite creative folks, Andy Miller, recently said that your art won't be alive if you aren't living. Boy, isn't that the truth. 

"If you want to change your life, change what you pay attention to."

I've been focusing a lot these days on what I'm giving my energy and attention to...on the vibes I'm sending out into the universe. And I'm seeing miraculous changes happen both for me mentally and in my career. My confidence has grown. I'm owning my strengths and talents in a way that is helping me share them in a more authentic way. 

Being open is SO important to creating space for those miracles to find their way to you. 

This book is a fun, quick, and encouraging read, and I really recommend it if you are feeling stuck and need a gentle kick in the pants to get you going again. 

*And if you need a few extra things to make you feel good about the world, I recommend these:

• Tiger Woods. Oh this made my heart soar!

• Lennon Stella. This girl's voice has been playing on repeat for me lately

• Everything Morgan Harper Nichols shares is pure joy and encouragement 

Sending joy-filled vibes to you!

Holiday Permission

This is your permission.

Permission to be fully you during the holidays.

Permission to be sad about what isn't, while joyful about what is.

To not allow others' anxieties, hang-ups, and issues to become your anxieties, hang-ups and issues.

Permission to feel lost and yet found.

To be whole. To be rooted. To be free.

To feel grounded in the middle of everyone else's chaos.

You get to decide.

You are in charge. 

And isn't that a lovely thing?

Sending hugs, peace, and light to you,

One Little Word 2019

Hello there friend!

I hope December is treating you well so far. Is it flying for you like it is over here in our corner of the world? Goodness it will be Christmas like...tomorrow? And 2019 like...in a week? It certainly feels that way.

I've been thinking about writing this post for a few days now. To talk about my OLW (one little word) for 2018 and what I've chosen for 2019. I've been choosing a word to guide my year for several years now, and most years my words have served me so well. Like in 2017 when my word was MAGIC. 

For 2018, I chose the word balance. 

This choice came after a chaotic and anything but balanced end of 2017, when I decided I had to pay better attention to self-care and focusing on the things that mattered in 2018. 

Little did I know what the coming year had in store for me. 

2018 was not balanced at all. Comically so. Like when I look at that cute acrylic word cut out up there, which I keep in our bedroom, it makes me giggle every time. 

It was the most painfully awkward and mentally draining year I've ever experienced. Counting down the days until 2019 over here. 

It caught me by surprise, knocked the air out of me, left me in a panic more times than I could have imagined, and forced me into painful experiences of growth I would not have chosen. 

Family illness, huge shifts in relationships, crazy big changes in my day job, my boys starting middle school, and all of the challenges that come with working an 8-5 while also working toward an art career at the same time.

I had lunch with a friend a few months ago, when I was in the thick of the hardest part of the year. Thank goodness for friends who'll let you confess that you are losing your shit while sharing a plate of BBQ nachos.  

She helped me realize that every significant area of my life was out of balance. Work, family, extended family, my art career. Nothing felt settled. No wonder I was a disaster. Ha! 

Now this is the part when I get really honest with you. For most of this year I have resented my day job in the worst way. I was in a terrible downward spiral. I wanted out. All of the change and upheaval at my job, while mostly positive, were too much for my slow-to-change soul to handle. 

One of the most challenging parts of this year? 2018 required me to use my voice in big, scary ways. You know that saying about speaking your truth, even if your voice shakes? Yep, this year had that covered for me, quite literally. 

I found myself in situations where I had to speak up about extremely difficult things. (Going back to that voice shaking thing here.) There were so many times when I wasn't sure if I should have said anything. And then after that hard experience or meeting, someone would come up to me and thank me for speaking up. And each time that happened, it became clearer to me that my voice mattered. 

The words I said actually made a difference...brought about change. Whoa. I had never experienced that before. 

And then in early November my body decided it was not having any more of this nonsense and totally went on strike during one of my biggest work event weekends of the year. I ended up in bed for three days straight after a massive panic attack. It was like my body and soul had a come to Jesus meeting and decided no way, no how, was Mandy going to spend two days being hostess to 80 people.

But that weekend was like a reset for me. I came out of it feeling relieved and ready to face whatever was ahead. And so very thankful I had come through the other side. 

I also realized that I've been trying so hard to keep areas of my life separate from each other. 

The Mandy who works 8-5 in higher ed AND the professional artist Mandy. 

The quiet, introvert Mandy AND the not afraid to speak her mind Mandy. *It was such a surprise to meet that version of me this year...I think I'll keep her.

The Mandy who is mourning change while simultaneously thanking God for new opportunities. 

The Mandy who is thankful for her current life while at the same time dreaming of more.

I want to remember in 2019 that I can be all of the things I am, all at the same time. 

I can be filled with anxiety while also using my voice and speaking my truth. I can work 8-5 in a seminary and then come home and draw illustrations for my art agent. I can be humble while also sharing my gifts and knowledge. 

It might seem a bit silly to even need to say these things because they are all a part of who I am, but for some reason I've fought letting them all live together. 

So when thinking about a word for 2019, I wasn't even sure if I was going to choose one. I mean, 2018's word fell totally flat on it's face. I knew that if I was going to choose one it needed to be exactly the right thing. I didn't want an unattainable goal, or a word that would put unneeded pressure on me after the dumpster fire of a year I had just gone through.

And then I figured it out. 

My word for 2019 is...AND.

More specifically, the ampersand (&) because it's just so darn cute. 

I want to embrace every single part of who I am this year, and not worry so much about making the wrong choices, saying the wrong thing, looking or acting differently than others might expect from me. 

I didn't realize how much I was doing this until everything I relied on got flipped on it's side this year. 

If you've made it through this entire post, bless your heart and thank you. I know I don't blog like I used to, but I have so many friends that have been with me since the beginning of this crazy little space, and I appreciate each and every one of you so very much.

I haven't decide on a talisman for 2019 to keep my word close to my mind and my heart, but with how much I love the ampersand I might just have to get a few different things. I've been pinning ideas here. 

Do you have a word for 2019? I'd love to hear more about it in the comments!

Here's to a new year of embracing every single little thing that makes you, you! 

XO,

Coffee Talk

If we were having coffee this morning, I would tell you that whatever you are struggling with, you may think you can't handle, but you are most certainly qualified.

I would tell you that you are growing and learning, and through this hard stuff you are becoming even more of the person you are meant to be.

I would tell you to keep moving forward, to remember to take deep breaths, and to not feel guilty for that extra dash of cream and sugar in your cup.

Wishing you an encouraging, cozy, and joy-filled Friday friends!

XO,

Hope

“Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come.” - Anne Lamott

If you are going through hard things, in a tough season, feeling hopeless, raw, or exhausted, this is for you. 

You are not alone friend, and we're in this together.

XO,

A bit of encouragement for all of us...

The creator’s journey is not for the faint of heart.

Once you figure out that thing you want to do with your life, you’ll do just about anything to make it happen. But the path is usually unclear. Sometimes you wonder if you’ll ever find it.

It comes with hurdles, speed bumps, closed doors, and doors you have to decide to open or not. It takes courage to accept the lot of it, allow yourself to wallow for a bit in disappointment, be okay with settling into discomfort, know that you will never do it perfectly, know that there will be times of genius and times of absolutely no inspiration to be found, know that there will always be competition, but also know that no one else can do it like you.

And the path you are paving is only creatable by you.

For all of us that are finding our way toward our creative destiny, we are not alone.

So keep going.

Don’t give up.

We were made for this.


Hanging in there with you,

Breaking Free

There have been two times in my life when I felt as if the universe was guiding my soul and circumstances in a way that was not under my control.

The first was five years ago when I came back to drawing.

The second is happening pretty much right now as I type this, and has been ruminating for almost all of 2018 so far.

Everything feels a bit like it is floating in a holding space, between the now and the what is going to be, and I'm just waiting for the second gate to open and let me through. 

Meanwhile God is sending me some stellar growth opportunities.

That last line was written with a bit of sarcasm, because GOODNESS. I'm spent.

Now is the time when I need to admit I had gotten myself to a very cranky place. And when I say cranky I mean bitter, annoyed, frustrated...all of those emotions we are taught to hold inside, mask with a smile, work through with a few encouraging images shared from Pinterest. I've been trying that last one and it does help a bit. 

Funny thing about God and the universe is that sometimes when you are begging for mercy, it comes in the exact opposite form you were expecting. 

For me, mercy has looked like two weeks full of challenging situations...using my voice, speaking up for myself and for others, facing hard truths, and stepping into my fullest potential. 

It has been EXHAUSTING and at the same time EMPOWERING.

You feel like you are facing it all alone. And at times you are. But I've also had friends stand up for me, take my hand and say, "I'm with you," thank me for having the courage to speak up. 

I even got a "That took guts!" which I have never, ever in my life been told. 

I have guts?! 

Surely they were mistaken.

But you know what? Turns out I do. They've been in there all along. 

The five-year-old who used to hide behind her mother's legs at church. 

The early twenty something who quit more than one job because she was terrified of failure. 

The girl who dropped an art class in college because she couldn't stand anyone watching her draw. (I know, right?!) 

She had guts. She didn't know how to use them yet, but they were already there. 

And the funny thing about using your guts is they multiply exponentially super fast with each use. Kind of like eating Grape Nuts cereal. You take one bite, and it's replaced with two more. 

The supply just keeps building, cheering you on from the conference room, the art table, the coworker's office, the email inbox. 

I was on the treadmill yesterday morning thinking about the past few weeks and shedding a few tears, (exercise is emotional you guys) and quickly typed up this list of instructions that helped get me through...

• Speak up
• Even when it is hard. Especially when it is. 
• Lean in
• Don't run away from the hard stuff. Know that it is helping you grow.
• Hold on
• Tight. To whatever you know is true and good in your life. The people, the feelings, the experiences.
• Power down
• Rest. Relax. Do what you need to do to regroup.
• Zone out
• Sometimes you have to escape from all of it, even for a few minutes. That's OK! Turn off your mind, take a nap, meditate, eat a pint of ice cream. Whatever works. 

*May I suggest 4 & 5 be done appropriately with your favorite Netflix show, your comfiest pants, and whatever comfort food fits your mood at the moment. 

Here is an illustration of me powering down, you know, for visual reference.

The lesson in all of this is I'm right where I need to be. And you are too. 

Life being hard and challenging doesn't have to mean you are stuck. 

Sometimes it is giving you the opportunity to break free. 

So a little recap for us all:

• Use those guts God gave you
• You are not stuck
• You are right where you need to be
• You are breaking free

You got this.

XO,

What I've read so far this year...

Not to toot my own horn or anything, but it is January 13th, and I've already read two books this year.

I know. You're wondering, "How does she do it?" 

Well, for one, I have a fairly messy house. 

And these books aren't exactly novels. 

BUT. I READ TWO BOOKS.

And I want to share them with you, because they are both lovely!

So here goes...

The first book is The Velveteen Principles by Toni Raiten-D'Antonio. I technically began this book before the new year because it was a Christmas gift, but I finished it in January, so I'm counting it. 

I make up the rules around here, OK? 

The Velveteen Principles is basically a guide to being human, revolving around the lessons in The Velveteen Rabbit.

The theme of this book appealed to me because I love everything about this quote from the original children's book:

"It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But those things don’t matter at all, because once you are real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”


It is an easy and lovely read. 

I can't say I learned a whole lot of earth shattering things or had a lot of light bulb moments. I can owe that partly to working in an environment with, and being surrounded generally in life with, people who have taught me a ton about the value of being authentic, and the beauty that can be found in being real and flawed. 

But this book was certainly a great refresher course & kick in the pants to keep moving in that direction.

Here is one quote that gave me a whoa moment:

"Remember, the most important and most lovable parts of you are invisible." 

I mean I already knew that, but forget it so often. The visible things about being human can be great, but they sure don't make up your worth as a human being, soul, friend, sister, wife, mother etc. 

This book was a fairly quick read and I recommend it if you need some extra shots of encouragement in a world that is constantly bombarding us with messages of how we need to measure up to others. 

The second book is My Friend Fear by Meera Lee Patel. 

I devoured this book in only a few sittings because it is not only beautifully written but visually stunning. Meera Lee's paintings and lettering accompany her words in such a way that you really feel like you become part of the book as you read it. 

As someone who has dealt with anxiety and fear for as long as I can remember, her honesty around how she has befriended her fear encouraged me to do more of the same. 

I typically do a lot of underlining in my books, but this one is so gorgeous that I didn't want to mark up the pages. 

Quotes that especially stuck with me...

"If the pull of fear is holding you back from cultivating your dream, spend more time listening."

"Where there is self-awareness and surrender, there is no shame in blooming alone."

And a few beautiful images from the book...

I really recommend this book if anxiety and/or fear are holding you back from experiencing your best life. 

I'm looking forward to sharing more of what I read this year with you. Any suggestions? What are you reading? I'd love to hear about it!

XO,

For You

A bouquet for you...

Just because.

Maybe it has been a rough morning, or week, or year so far.

Maybe you are doubting yourself or your talents.

Maybe you simply feel like crap.

You are OK, friend.


XO,

A Year of New Things

A new year brings about all sorts of resolutions and exclamations that, "This year will be different!" I'll do this, and stop doing that. 

I've never been much for resolutions. I don't perform well under pressure. I like to move where my soul leads me. 

But I do like this idea of starting something new. Fresh beginnings. Not a new diet, or a new set of goals, but new practices that will bring me closer to my best self.

New breath

New choices

New joy

New grace

New attention

And maybe not always so much "new" but "reNEWed." 

What will be new or renewed for you this year?

Choosing Slow

Things are moving at a slower pace at our house these days.

It was an intentional change, but not one without a fair share of anxiety, fear, and a few tears. 

My husband quit his job on August 5th.

And on August 6th we began a whole new way of living as a family of four. 

(On my 39th birthday...what wonderful timing!)

It is, for lack of a much better word, wonderful.

This isn't our first time with him staying home with the boys. Back when they were babies, he quit his job to stay home with them from about 16 months until they started kindergarten.

And that was wonderful.

But a TOTALLY different kind of wonderful. A much more tired version.

*one of the more tired days (twins + IKEA)

We had two babies, our income was quite a bit lower, we had just moved into a new house, and we were both navigating what it meant to be parents. Me a working mom, and him a stay-at-home dad, which isn't something our culture encourages or celebrates nearly enough. 

Even though he was home, he was much busier keeping up with the demands of young twins. I was figuring out how to deal with the guilt of not being home with the boys, and how to keep up with my day job while mom brain was in full effect. Those days were tired. Wonderful, but oh so tired.

But this time, the decision for him to quit his job wasn't out of the same necessity as 8 years ago. The need was different, but equally important.

To be honest, our mental health was at stake. His mental health especially. His job had turned into a horrible mess. My husband wasn't himself at all. We were bickering, short tempered, and tired. The house wasn't being taken care of, we weren't eating well...the list goes on and on. 

And it changed in the matter of a few weeks. His job went from bearable to inducing panic attacks. It felt like one of the hardest and yet easiest decisions ever to say JUST QUIT.

JUST QUIT.

This life we are given is worth more than countless hours spent working hard for a company that doesn't respect your work ethic or your family. To make money to spend on more stuff you don't have time to enjoy. 

Oh it felt SO good to make this decision as a family. I honestly haven't felt closer to him than I have the past few weeks as we made this intentional decision to find a new way of living. We've been together since he was 19 and I was 21, and I am amazed to see how we have grown together. And I am so very thankful that growth has brought us together, and not pulled us apart. Because oh there were times I worried it would. 

I've wanted to share this with you all since it happened, but needed to wait until the words came. And today they came.

And I want to encourage you, if your way of living right now doesn't feel like it is working. If you are exhausted and cranky and not enjoying your family or the things you feel like you should be, it is ok to start over. It is so much more than ok to find a way of living that doesn't look like the way anyone else is doing it. And don't worry about what others think or say...all that matters is that it works for your family.

And the peace we feel in our house these past few weeks. Man I wish I could bottle it up, because everything about it is so very good.

And speaking of remaking your life, this Super Soul Sunday talk from one of my absolute favorite authors Shauna Niequist is all about slowing down and it is really wonderful. 

Thanks for taking the time to read this, and I hope it resonates with you in some way!

XO,

Full Sized You

I drew this a few weeks ago after jotting the words below in my notebook...

Don't stop. 

Don't hide. 

Don't discount your talent. 

Don't apologize for it. 

Don't shrink!

The world needs FULL SIZED YOU!

We really do. Give us all you got!

Sending love and brave vibes to you today friend,

New Product + Encouragement for YOU!

Happy Wednesday friends!

I have some exciting news to share with you today...a new product launch!

So a little back story...if you can humor me for a minute. And I promise there is a reason for the story that I think will encourage you.

About a month ago I posted a new pattern on my Instagram... 

A new Insta friend, Elaine, commented on the pattern that it would be lovely for bible journaling, and asked if I had a printable of it available. 

How did she know that I've been wanting to start creating scrapbooking illustrations? It was like she read my mind.  

When I saw that she works for Illustrated Faith, I sent her a direct message and asked if she had any tips on what types of items would be popular for bible journaling, since that is a completely new concept to me. 

She replied with a few tips, but also an invitation to be the April guest designer for the Illustrated Faith digital shop!

Talk about an exciting invitation! And one that I didn't need much time to deliberate. 

Umm, YES PLEASE!

Those who have followed me for a long time know that I used to be an obsessed scrapbooker which makes this new adventure all the more exciting. Creating my OWN scrapbooking embellishments?! 

Holy.Cow.

Even though I don't scrapbook anymore, I've always had a huge thing for the patterned paper, the stickers...all of it.

Because Elaine loved my pattern so much, I took it as my starting cue for the collection, and went with a theme of hope and faith in things unseen, because that is a huge mantra for my life these days. 

The kit includes a page of embellishments and another page with four journaling cards. 

There are a few things I really love about it.

It is authentically me. The hand drawn images, the child-like feel, and the message of hope. It is all ME. I'm a ridiculously hopeful person and I also believe in the magic and mystery of what we can't see and how it brings together fantastically wonderful opportunities for us in this life. 

This kit pulls together all of that into a sweet little printable you can buy for $4.50. I tell ya that is quite a deal, right? Right. 

I'm just over the moon about it. 

Right now I'm using one of the bible margin covers (the long skinny pieces) as a bookmark which is just perfect, especially for my new Anne Lamott book (all the heart eyes!)...

You can check out the lovely things Elaine did with the kit over on the Illustrated Faith blog. That girl is good! 

Here is one of her images showing the embellishments close up. Gah they make my heart skip a beat!

And I'm super happy to share that I'll be doing another kit for them in May! I can't wait to see what comes together for the next one. 

So the lesson in all of this?

Keep going. 

Keep sharing. 

Keep doing the things you love and the threads will connect together in the ways they are meant to. 

Those things that you can't not do with your time? The ones that excite you so much that you stay up too late on a work night or wake up first thing in the morning thinking about? 

Keep doing them! Even if you aren't sure where they might take you. 

That's where the magic is.

XO,